Elton John's Home Again

More news from the local grapevine is pouring in concerning yesterday's story about whether Sir Elton John owns a home in the Caledon Hills near Toronto.

Traffic in the store and on Blighty's website has increased dramatically since the Toronto Star broke the news about Sir Elton's possible local home yesterday. People have been crowding into the store to share their tidbits of information on the subject.

Caledon is a small rural town in southern Ontario. The nearest local shopping area is in the adjacent town of Orangeville, a few short kilometers from Sir Elton's sprawling mansion on the edge of the Niagara Escarpment. This is a close knit community and people talk.

Here is what Blighty's Blog has learned
A smokescreen cover story was released to members of the local private golf club that the home in question is actually owned by a reclusive billionaire. The name of the recluse was disclosed to Blighty's Blog golf reporter Andrew Oldcourse, but further investigation of the named individual has failed to turn up any information about the man or the source of his money.

Key Evidence Revealed
During early construction a local resident ignored signs posted on the property that read: "No trespassing, by order of an English knight who plays the piano and likes his privacy!". Stealthily penetrating the very structure of the building he found a large pool with elaborate fountains and something else that is a very important piece of evidence.

Sir Elton John is a "Petrolhead"
Our local, intrepid amateur spy, Jim Bond, discovered a feature of the house that inextricably links Sir Elton - a known "petrolhead" (car enthusiast) - with the building. The feature is a rotating garage with a capacity for 30 cars. Sir Elton owns a large collection of expensive cars.

"The Client" is Coming!
Construction work continues on the house. The building itself is substantially complete as could be seen in the picture published by the Toronto Star yesterday. Some local tradesmen are still working at the property. One of Blighty's customers told Blighty's Blog this morning that one contractor's craftsmen were told to expedite completion of their efforts last week because "the client" was coming to town. Sir Elton John performed at the Air Canada Centre in downtown Toronto just a fews days ago.

The Registered Homeowner is ...
If I were a multi-millionaire performer who wanted a private hideaway nestled in an exclusive neighborhood, safe from the prying eyes of local serfs, I would probably register ownership through a foreign numbered corporation with nominee directors.

Sir Elton had other thoughts apparently. And this tidbit is, thus far, unsubstantiated rumour. Sir Elton had ownership of the house registered in the name of his partner's (David Furnish) parents. That should be fairly easy for somebody connected with the real estate industry to check out.

Meanwhile, Down in the Valley
At the foot of the hill, below Sir Elton's new house, lies a scenic road twisting and turning alongside the Credit River. Blighty's Blog has hired the services of a resident of that road to keep watch over activities at the top of the hill. So, Sir Elton, while you and David are kicking back with a glass of wine on your deck some evening this week, the strange reflection you see at the bottom of the hill will be the setting sun glinting off the binoculars held by Blighty's Blog's observer-in-action Ms Soon C. Hoos-Thair.

Elton John at Home in Canada

Does Sir Elton John own a home in Caledon, near Toronto, or is this just an urban myth? I was quoted in an article in the Toronto Star newspaper today affirming strong local belief that Sir Elton is one of our neighbours.

One thing is sure, a huge mansion is nearing completion alongside Highway 10 at the top of the escarpment just south of Caledon Village, about 80km north-west of Toronto. The house is at the end of a long driveway with a security guard booth at the entrance.

A lot of prominent and wealthy Canadians live nearby. The Eaton family (formerly of the iconic Canadian retail store chain) live only a kilometer or so from Sir Elton's new home. John Roth, former head of Nortel, built a mansion nearby. The Armstrong family - prominent racehorse owners and builders of Ontario's massive highway 401 own large properties in the area.

Take a drive through the lanes around the Devil's Pulpit area west of highway 10 along the edge of the Niagara Escarpment and you will find many prominent homes with electronic security at the gates. This is the neighborhood where Canada's wealthy elite kick off their shoes.

I was first made aware that this home belonged to Sir Elton by a local Canada Post manager. If anybody should know who lives there it is surely the post office. When Sir Elton performed in Sudbury a few months ago there was a lot of activity around the home that his partner, Canadian David Furnish, denies owning.

Sir Elton John's principal residence is in Old Windsor, England. But, he is known to own other homes in Venice, Atlanta and Nice. So why such secrecy surrounding a possible home in Canada? And if Sir Elton doesn't own the property in Caledon, who does?

Blighty's Blog investigative reporter Hugh Dunnit has uncovered evidence that Sir Elton is not, in fact, the owner of the home. The property is believed to be registered in the name of a Mr Reginald Dwight.

A nod's as good as a wink to a blind horse, as they say in jolly old England.

Save Hundreds on UK/Canada Trips

I booked my flights for the UK yesterday. I'll be off to the Land of Hope and Glory for a fortnight in the summer. But I nearly made a serious error and, in the process, learned something very important about a popular airline on the Canada/UK route.

The Dot Com Boom is Bust
I won't shame the airline involved by naming it, but let us just say that it "spans the globe". I couldn't remember the website address so I entered the airline name in my browser's address bar and hit enter. Up popped the airline's dot com address, so I clicked on it and began booking my flights. I went through the process and got a price quote. Then I decided to check out alternatives.

The Maple Leaf Forever
The alternatives didn't look any better than my first choice so I returned to the "span the globe" website. I noticed a Maple Leaf symbol at the top of the website and clicked on it. That click took me from the airline's dot com website to its dot ca website.

Free Car Rental for a Fortnight?
I entered the same flight information as I had before, but this time I was offered the option of booking a rental car as well. I'll be needing wheels while in the UK so I chose that option. Imagine my surprise when the bottom line price was nearly the same as the booking for "flights only" through the dot com site.

Blimey, is this right?
The airline's dot com website is based in the UK, while its dot ca website is based in Canada. I doubled checked the bookings on both the dot com and dot ca websites for the same flights on the same airline and got a big shock.

Save Hundreds of Dollars
I found hundreds of dollars difference in price between the two websites. Yes, exactly the same flights, on the same day, same airline cost hundreds less if booked through the airline's Canadian website.

I won't challenge the airline to explain, it just might trigger a price increase for Canadians. But remember to tell all your family and friends in the UK that if they want to span the globe to Canada they should book their tickets through you-know-who's dot ca website.

The British Bobby Helmet

I was strolling through a small Ontario town last weekend. About half way down the street I tapped my wife on the shoulder and said: "hold on a minute, I just want to pop into one of these stores and pick up an authentic South Shields Police helmet".

I am sure it must be the sort of thing that most people do on a sunny spring holiday afternoon in Canada.

So I turned around and walked into a nearby store and, sure enough, they still had just one South Shields Police helmet left on their shelves. I pulled out my wallet, paid the shopkeeper and took home my prize.

"Lucky me" I thought. If had wanted a North Shields Police helmet I would have been out of luck today.

For anybody who is not familiar with the geography of north-east England, I should point out that North Shields and South Shields lie on opposite shores at the mouth of the River Tyne.

My choice was South Shields because one of my favourite customers is a lady from that town who now lives in Orangeville, Ontario. After many long years living in Canada she still speaks with a strong Geordie accent. She was absolutely thrilled when I showed her the police helmet from her home town.

So You Think You Know British Bobby Helmets?
I thought I could recognize a British police helmet without any trouble. It has a distinctive shape, a shiny badge at the front and, you know, a "thing" on top. I did some quick research on my acquisition and found out that there is a lot more to the British police helmet than I had thought.

If you would like to know more there is an excellent, highly informative FAQ on the subject on the constabulary.com website. Visiting that site I learned that there are at least three main styles of British police helmet. The principal distinguishing feature seems to be what type of "thing" adorns the top of the helmet.

My helmet is a home office standard type and will be on display at the store from tomorrow. No, you can't try it on.

The Hard Times of Old England

Conversations I have had with family over 'ome lately reveal that England is suffering much more badly from the global recession than Canada. So when I listened to a favourite folk song over the weekend, I was so moved by the lyrics that I thought I would share them with Blighty's Blog readers.

The song was written by the folk-rock band Steeleye Span and is called "The Hard Times of Old England". I hope you enjoy the lyrics as much as I do:

Come all brother tradesmen that travel the land
Oh pray come and tell me where the trade is all gone
Long time have I travelled and I cannot find none

And sing oh the hard times of old England
in old England very hard times

Provisions you buy at the shop it is true
But if you've no money there's none there for you
So what's a poor man and his family to do

And sing oh the hard times of old England
in old England very hard times

You must go to the shop and you'll ask for a job
They'll answer you there with a shake and a nod
And that's enough to make a man turn out a rob

And sing oh the hard times of old England
in old England very hard times

You will see the poor tradesman a walking the street
From morning 'till night for employment to seek
And scarce have they got any shoes on their feet

And sing oh the hard times of old England
in old England very hard times

Our soldiers and sailors have just come from war
Been fighting for Queen and country this year
Come home to be starved better stayed where they were

And sing oh the hard times of old England
in old England very hard times

And now to conclude and to finish my song
Let us hope that these hard times they will not last long
I hope soon to have occasion to alter my song, and sing

Oh the good times of old England
in old England jolly good times!

Nought to get cross about

I have good news, bad news and worse news. I popped into Staples (the stationery store) yesterday and bought Oxo. I wasn't satisfied with the product and took it back for an exchange. The exchange item was unsatisfactory so I returned it too. But why would a stationery store be selling Oxo? Therein lies today's tale.

Oxo - as we know it
The product we all know as "Oxo" was invented in 1866 and was originally marketed under the name "Liebig's Meat Extract". It was as recently as 1899 that it was rebranded as "Oxo". (Yes, "recently"; when you can trace your national heritage back over 2000 years a mere century is "recent").

The original product comprised 96% real beef stock and 4% salt. Over the years, the various big corporations that have owned the product have found ways to make it more cheaply. Along the way it changed from a viscous liquid to the familiar crumbly cube that we know today.

Rumour has it that there may still be a remnant of actual beef content in it. If that conjures up mental pictures of thick juicy slices of prime rib, be prepared for disappointment. All the meat was gone from the poor old ox before it gave its bones to the men from Oxo.

A Staple Diet?
So back to Staples. The product I purchased was - incredibly - an "Oxo" branded stapler. The packaging made it clear that this was indeed the same "Oxo" that makes beef cubes in the United Queendom.

Oxo beef cubes are delicious in gravy or as a beefy hot drink; that's the good news. Oxo staplers are a poor quality item that should not be on the shelves of any store; that's the bad news.

And the Worse News is
The men from the Canadian Fool Inspection Agency (CFIA) have learned that staplers made from English beef are entering Canada. As we all know, UK beef products are banned from Canada to prevent Canadian Mad Cow Disease being contaminated by British Mad Cow Disease.

As a result, it may be hard to find any product whose label bears the letters "OXO" on any store shelf in Canada for the foreseeable future. Ottawa's relentless inspectors are seizing beef stock cubes, staplers and a popular board game in their tireless efforts to protect Canadians.

Best Before Best Before Dates

I took the first crop of the year from the rhubarb growing in my garden today. I decided to make a rhubarb crumble for dessert this evening. I had a pack of Green's Crumble Mix in my kitchen cabinet so I thought I would put it to good use. I casually glanced at the "best before" date on the back of the pack: December 2007 - 16 months past its "best before" date - then used it without a second thought.

"Best before" dates are commonly misunderstood and I spend an inordinate amount of time trying to explain the meaning of "best before" to my customers.

Some customers do not pay any attention at all to "best before" dates while others regard "best before" as meaning: "beware, this product will quite suddenly become unfit for human consumption on this date".

It would be interesting to speculate whether those who rigidly follow "best before" dates when buying products, subsequently discard products in their own kitchen cabinets that have passed their "best before" date.

What Does "Best Before" Really Mean?
I researched online with the UK's Food Standards Agency and with the Canadian Food Inspection Agency. Both these official government bodies agree that "best before" represents the date after which the manufacturer or retailer believes the product MAY BEGIN TO LOSE ITS FLAVOUR OR FRESHNESS.

"Best before" is NOT an "expiry" date. Many (in fact most) products retain their flavour or freshness for weeks, months - and sometimes years - past their "best before" date.

Government Regulations!
I am not aware that any food manufacturer performs any testing to determine what actually happens to its products after the date stamped on the packaging. In most cases, the manufacturer is simply making a wild guess in order to comply with government labelling regulations.

What is the Effect on the Consumer?
Government would, no doubt, tell us that "best before" dates protect the consumer. But like almost anything governments do, the reverse is actually happening. "Best before" results in a huge amount of waste. Vast quantities of perfectly good food are being needlessly sent to the landfill.

Consumers are paying a premium to cover the cost of retailers being forced to discount, or dispose of, food that has passed its "best before" date.

Wouldn't it be better if ...
Wouldn't it be an altogether better idea to mark food with a "made on" date and allow consumers to decide whether the food will still offer the freshness and flavour they expect?

Blighty's "Best Before" Policy
Blighty's Tuck Store marks down the price of every product that has passed its "best before" date by 50% or more. And the cost of that apparent generosity is a component of the price you pay when you buy a fresh product. Thank your government.

The Builder's Breakfast

The British people have spoken ... and they are dead wrong!

In a vote that meant more to some than a general election, the British people have chosen a new flavour for Walkers Crisps.

Back at the beginning of the year Walkers started a competition called "Do us a flavour". Customers were asked to suggest new flavours for Walkers best-selling brand of potato crisps.

From among the many entries, Walkers chose six for a test run. Customers were then asked to vote for their favourite. The winner would be adopted as a permanent flavour, and the rest ... off to the great crisp graveyard in the sky.

The test run six were: Fish & Chips, Crispy Duck & Hoisin, Cajun Squirrel, Builder's Breakfast, Onion Bhaji and Chilli & Chocolate.

In an unofficial Canadian poll, Blighty's Tuck Store's customers voted overwhelmingly in favour of "Fish & Chips". The British people did not agree. They chose "Builder's Breakfast". Fools.

The person who suggested "Builder's Breakfast" has been handsomely rewarded with a cheque for fifty thousand smackers plus 1% of future sales.

Incidentally Canadians voted Builder's Breakfast #2 but they agreed with the people of Britain in voting Chilli & Chocolate absolutely dead last. Goodbyeeee vile C&C! Sadly, goodbye also to our favourite Fish & Chips.

Click on the title of this post to view the videos of the announcement ceremony on Walkers website.

McVities Chocolate Digestives

Ever heard of the cookie monster? I believe that whoever the monster is, one thing is for sure - he or she must be British.

You see, somebody in the UK is eating 52 McVities Chocolate Digestive biscuits every second. And since Blighty's Tuck Store began its special on McVities Milk and Dark Chocolate Digestives, somebody in Canada is trying to catch up.

McVities is a brand belonging to United Biscuits, a giant UK food corporation but the McVities digestive biscuit story began in 1925 when the original digestive was invented by a new, young employee called Alexander Grant. Now, 71 million packets of McVities chocolate digestives are produced every year.

The McVities digestives family includes the original biscuit without the chocolate, a dark chocolate covered biscuit and a milk chocolate covered biscuit. Digestives do not aid digestion, but the name originated from the belief that the high baking soda content did just that.

At Blighty's Tuck Store, customers choose McVities brand in preference to all the other brands we have put on the shelves. The milk and dark chocolate digestives are among the best-selling items in the store.

Footnote:
Blighty's has a special on McVities Milk and Dark Chocolate Digestive biscuits for a limited time. Check Blighty's weekly newsletter for details. If you would like a personal copy of our store specials and clearance items newsletter delivered to your email inbox once per week you can subscribe to Blighty's Store Newsletter here.

Rich Tea Biscuits - Go Dunk!

A cup of tea is too wet
According to the words of an old British TV commercial: "a cup of tea's too wet without one". The commercial was for the famous and highly inappropriately named "Rich Tea biscuit".

Dunk It. Once!
But perhaps I rush to judgement. The Rich Tea biscuit is famously dunkable. It is also famously fragile when wet. Comedian Peter Kay is quoted as calling the Rich Tea biscuit the "one-dunker". Dunk it a second time and you will be fishing debris out of your teacup (with a spoon please - we're British).

What's in a name?
So why "Rich Tea"? Was the marketing department at the biscuit factory anticipating their product would attract the attention of Britain's dunkers? Remember, dunk it twice and the debris from your biscuit will be navigating the bottom of your teacup, making your tea richer.

Or could it be those same marketing men, realizing their product was plain and lacking in frills, gave it a fancy name to create an up-market image? Either way, it's a "canny little biscuit" as they say in the northeast of England.

So eschew those high-calorie chocolate covered cookies you find on Blighty's shelves. Buy some of the Rich Tea biscuits we mentioned in this week's Blighty's store newsletter instead and, while you're at it, grab some of our bargain priced Yorkshire Tea.

Now find a nice cosy chair in the privacy of your own home and get dunking!

McVitie's Jaffa Cakes (and the evil taxman)

We announced, in this week's Blighty's newsletter, that we have McVitie's Jaffa Cakes back in stock. Then we realized, some folks don't know what they is. They is bloomin' good little snack-sized cakes, that's what they is.

Jaffa Cakes comprise a sponge base covered in orange flavoured jelly all topped with rich, dark chocolate.

If you would like a few moments of mild distraction try visiting the official Jaffa Cake website. You won't learn much about the product but it's worth a visit even if only for the amusing little stress-relieving game on the site.

Cakes or cookies?
Gentlemen in England raised swords against gentlemen in England to determine the answer to this question. Well almost. Her Majesty's taxmen challenged McVitie's to prove that Jaffa Cakes are indeed cakes rather than biscuits (that's "cookies" here in the colonies).

You see Jaffa Cakes look like cookies. In England, cookies are taxed, cakes are not. So how was the matter settled?

Stalemate resolved with stale cakes
Her Majesty's kind, benevolent taxmen threw down the gauntlet and challenged McVitie's to prove that their cake was in fact a cake. The cakemakers tried baking a supersize Jaffa Cake to convince the taxmen, but to no avail.

The case was so protracted that exhibit A: Jaffa Cakes went stale. Counsel for the defence pointed out that cakes go hard when stale, while cookies go soft. The learned Lord presiding over the case put the product to ordeal by judicial cakehole - he tasted the stale product - and it was hard.

Taxman retreats with tail between legs
And so it came to pass that Jaffa Cakes remain free from the burden of taxation. Let's all weep together for the poor taxman, ... ready?

Yorkshire Tea Bargain

Blighty's Tuck Store is very proud to be selling one of the finest teas money can buy. And not only that, we have an enormous sale going on during which we are offering this very fine tea for a fraction of its usual price.

What's the sale price?
80 bags for $3.99
160 bags for $6.99

These prices are almost exactly the same as Taylor's own prices in the UK. But we managed to get them transported to Canada, duty paid and still get them to you for an incredible low price.

Tell me more about Yorkshire Tea
Sure. The company is based in Harrogate, Yorkshire. It was founded in 1886 by a Yorkshire tea merchant called Charles Taylor. Taylor's prides itself on blending only very high quality teas and paying fair prices to its tea growers.

The company also rewards growers who demonstrate concern for quality and operate using fair business practices.

Is drinking tea good for me?
Yes, and it's probably good for you too (sorry - John's little word play joke). Yes, drinking tea is unequivocably beneficial to your health.

Tea contains anti-oxidants and will help protect you from heart disease, cancer and strokes. Tea also helps prevent arthritis, Alzheimer's and Parkinson's diseases.

Aren't all teas the same?
Ok, yes. All teas are the same. They are all made from the leaves of the same family of plant. But, apart from that, there are huge differences. There are black teas, white teas and green teas. Most teas are made from a blend of leaves from different tea gardens. The skill of the tea merchant is demonstrated in his ability to produce a blend that delivers the best flavour.

If you would like to know more take a look at the tea page on Blighty's website.

Ok, you've got the info, now come in and buy
Seriously though, we would appreciate it you buy your tea from Blighty's. We have a sixteen foot long shelf filled with different varieties of tea at the store. You can also order tea from Blighty's through our website (Canadian customers only).

Before you step into the super-saver-supermarket and lay down your hard-earned dollars for the big, cheap plastic bag full of bargain teabags, stop and think about why you are buying tea.

There is nothing like the rich, relaxing flavour of a good quality tea. Super-saver-supermarket nameless bargain bags just don't compare. And anyway, you can save a lot of money on one of the world's best teas at Blighty's during our Yorkshire Tea sale. Come along, why aren't you here yet?