I think I must be still asleep. Or perhaps it's all those chemicals I've been pumping into my bloodstream to fight the cold that still lingers two weeks after I first sneezed. Or maybe it really is silly season in the United Queendom.
I was watching BBC World News on the gogglebox this morning. There was a bizarre news item that caught my attention. Britain has regained the title in the world underwater ironing competition. Then the Beeb showed a video of people wearing SCUBA gear ironing their laundry underwater. I quickly reached for a third cup of coffee in an attempt to restore reality.
An hour or two later my laptop beeped to herald an incoming email from Pugwash (regular readers will know that Pugwash is the gentleman who imports all our Brit stuff). Walkers - the potato crisp people - are introducing some new flavours. Before you read on you had better do a Tim Horton's run to make sure you are fully awake.
ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?
Here are Walker's new flavours:
"Fish & Chips", "Crispy Duck", "Cajun Squirrel", "Onion Bhaji", "Chili Chocolate" and "Builder's Breakfast".
No, it's not a joke. At least it's not my joke anyway. Perhaps the Walker's Crisp people have spent too long at the bottom of a pond ironing their laundry.
I have ordered some of these bizarre crisps; they will be in stock well before April Fool's Day - trust me on this.
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