The first item was a revelation from Britain's tabloid Daily Mail newspaper that the London soccer team Arsenal has somehow managed to win a soccer match against London neighbours Chelsea by scoring LESS goals than their opponents.
Apparently, according to the newspaper sports page headline, Didier Drogba led Chelsea to defeat against Arsenal. And yet Chelsea scored more goals than Arsenal. Perhaps the rules of the game have changed since I fled to Canada nearly thirty years ago. Perhaps a more likely explanation is that the rules of English grammar have been relaxed a little too far.
Tap Dancing in Norwich, Lap Dancing in Leeds
Britain's venerated Daily Telegraph newspaper, meanwhile, carried reports of a new dance craze at English universities. Scientists at the University of East Anglia's Climate Research Unit are tap dancing their way around an expose of massive fraudulent manipulation of data used to support global warming.
The red-faced tap dancing men of Norwich, who may soon be considering alternative employment options should think about sending their resumes up north to Leeds.
Right alongside the story about "Climategate" the Daily Telegraph carried a report that Leeds University is seeking red-faced lap dancing men.
Is it time to stop taking British universities too seriously?