"Comedy always works best when it is mean-spirited" - John Cleese

Author John Corby also writes as "Bulldogge" for the British Canadian newspaper.

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Friday, December 03, 2010

Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson - Emperor of London

He has been called "the thinking man's idiot". Born in New York City (the one in America - not the one near Newcastle) he is a direct descendant of the last Grand Vizier of the Ottoman Empire, Prince Paul of W├╝rttemberg, King George II and King James I. He claims Muslim, Jewish and Christian heritage.

He could easily earn a good living as a stand-up comedian but he currently works in London - as Lord Mayor. Of all the incumbents of Mansion House (official residence of the Lord Mayor of London), Boris Johnson is ... definitely one of them.

Johnson was educated at Eton and Balliol College Oxford and, not surprisingly, is a stalwart of the British Conservative party. Actually he is 8th cousin to current British Conservative Prime Minister David Cameron.

He is a journalist and author of several books including: Friends, Voters, Countrymen: Jottings on the Stump; Lend Me Your Ears; Have I Got Views For You; Have I Got Views For You and Seventy-Two Virgins.

Boris Johnson likes to clown around and is one of the most quoted politicians (albeit in the fumbling manner of America's Dan Quayle) on the 'net. One never knows whether some of his quotes were made tongue in cheek, but here is a sampling:

  • It is said that the Queen has come to love the Commonwealth, partly because it supplies her with regular cheering crowds of flag-waving picaninnies
  • The problem is not that we were once in charge, but that we are not in charge any more... 
  • What transaction happened here? Have I just bought your house?
  • Look the point is ... er, what is the point? It is a tough job but somebody has got to do it.
  • My friends, as I have discovered myself, there are no disasters, only opportunities. And, indeed, opportunities for fresh disasters.
  • I can't remember what my line on drugs is. What's my line on drugs?
  • I could not fail to disagree with you less.
  • There may be a reason I can't think of but the problem with that reason is that I can't think of it now.
  • Voting Tory will cause your wife to have bigger breasts and increase your chances of owning a BMW M3.

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